A lot of people, myself included, struggle with small talk. We can’t think of things to say when faced with the daunting task of talking to people we don’t know. Out of our comfort levels and small circles of friends, we trip over words or make awkward comments when we finally do open our mouths. Or we need wine to get through the event, or at least I do. What I have learned after almost two years of blogging is that many bloggers admit to being introverts and social misfits but are still very good with words when they deliver them with a keyboard.
When I first started this adventure of blogging, I just wanted a creative means to toss stuff out into the world and clear my head. Then something happened. A couple of people liked my blogs. Only two, but it was very good for my ego. Then something else happened. Someone made a comment on a blog. Then I nearly had an anxiety attack. What was I supposed to do? What was I supposed to say? Is there an etiquette to all of this? What if I say the wrong thing? What if I make someone mad? I really didn’t want to make anyone mad. So I liked the comment and never heard from that person again.
Afterwards, I began liking people’s comments but not saying anything because I didn’t know how to respond. What happened next was a real surprise to me. Someone started commenting on a regular basis. (Thanks Margie) She always said such nice things. Things I could relate to. Then I started responding to her comments, taking a few minutes to think through my answers before sending them. Before long, I was responding immediately without thought or stress. We were having short conversations. We were making small talk. Very pleasant small talk that has turned into much more than small talk. We discovered that we have a lot in common. Now we never miss an opportunity to communicate by commenting on each other’s blogs.
Suddenly, I felt comfortable enough to comment on other people’s blogs. This occurred after realizing how much I enjoyed reading comments on my blog and gaining an some insight by learning from others how commenting was done. Why not spread the joy? Why not support others who are as honest and vulnerable as I am at times and are also putting themselves out there? I still take some time to think these comments through before posting them, but I am doing it nonetheless. And it is becoming easier and easier. I have met some very interesting and wonderful people this way. People who I now have short conversations with on a regular basis through commenting.
It has been very rewarding to settle into this blogging community. I believe we have all grown from this experience. We get to know ourselves a bit better, and we get to interact with others in a way that works very well for most of us. My blogging circle is pretty small but pretty nice. So nice that I sometimes have difficulty keeping up my bitchy facade. (I will have to work on that.) It has helped restore some lost confidence and has taught me to trust my instincts. Hopefully, this trust and my newly acquired small-talk skills will transfer over to face-to-face interactions in the future. If not, I will continue to practice by commenting on blogs.
Thank you for reading.
Photo: Speak No Evil Monkey Emoji