You may be a cartoon character if... ...You have been known to goofily send objects, often stemware, flying across the room with an over animated swish of your hand. ...You watch TV with Cruella de Vil hair while twisting and yanking your chin hairs and looking like an evil mastermind. ...You have two exclamation marks engraved between … Continue reading You May Be A Cartoon Character If…
Listening to the radio the other day I heard a statistic that made me wonder about the nature of human beings these days and how such intelligent creatures have evolved to the point that they seem to be regressing. In other words becoming a lot less intelligent. I'm trying to refrain from using the word … Continue reading A Wrinkly Statistic Of Human Regression
Folding laundry the other day, I couldn't help but notice the state of our underwear. What popped into my fairly empty head at the time was a statement I'm sure most of us heard in our youth, "make sure you put on clean underwear in case you have an accident." How could one not remember that piece … Continue reading A Rumination On Skivvies And Undies
Previously in the realm of after 60 bitchiness, The Bitch was on a tirade about technology and obsolescence. Specifically the fact that WordPress no longer communicated well with her computer and so she was trying to format blog posts on her iPad. Her laptop, which was dated, was still working fine and housed all her … Continue reading A Keyboard, A Mouse, And A Couple Of Puzzle Boxes
Once upon a time... (actually it was the winter of 2002) The Bitch received a phone call from a relative who complained and complained about the weather to the point that the bitch rolled her eyes and tried to preoccupy herself with other things while the relative continued to whine. She no sooner hung up … Continue reading A Winter Story Of A Winter Story
Remember the kid in class that you didn't want to have on your team for the spelling bee? Well I was that kid. I was also the kid that you didn't want to have on any sports teams, but that is a whole other story. I can't spell. Never could. I absolutely hated the spelling … Continue reading Spelling Bees And Piano Keys
If you're not familiar with Pavlov's dogs, let me offer a little history. In simple terms Ivan Pavlov was a Russian Scientist who ended up discovering and studying the process of learning known as classical conditioning. He realized that dogs that normally salivate when food was present learned to salivate when an unrelated stimulus was … Continue reading Pavlov’s Dog Of Bladder Control
Do what? Create blog content that's what. I am at a loss to figure out how some people can create so much content for their blogs while I currently find my brain lacking stimulus and my life pretty uneventful. There are bloggers out there who create one and sometimes more than one post every twenty-four … Continue reading How Do They Do It?
On New Years Eve, twenty-nine years ago, I entered the hospital pregnant with a baby who had been due on December 24th. Ask me how glad I was that I didn't have a Christmas Eve or even worse a Christmas Day baby? That certainly wasn't the plan. I was expecting the little bugger to show … Continue reading New Year’s Eve
You didn't think I would play by the rules... Did you? I was nominated by Margie from Back Roads and Other Stories to participate in the 10 travel photo challenge. Now I really like Margie. These days I live vicariously through her blogs. You should check them out. Plus she is an avid follower of … Continue reading Bending The Photo Challenge Rules
The Birthday Bitch has a reputation for being cranky and unappreciative. This has less to do with growing older than it does with sleep depravation. It doesn't matter whether it is her birthday or not, The Birthday Bitch is not someone you want to be around if she is lacking sleep. Certain relatives, morning people, … Continue reading The Birthday Bitch
Like toilet paper in April, fresh Nova Scotia Christmas trees this December are the product of panic shopping. This craze was aided by a few news stories discussing the fact that more trees have been exported south to the states this year. Apparently Americans love Canadian Christmas trees so they are considered a hot-ticket item … Continue reading The U-Cut Christmas Tree Appointment
In these times of heightened concerns about scams and identity theft, I would like to know who’s brilliant (read this with a sarcastic tone) idea it was to take my name and address and print it over and over again on ugly personal labels in an attempt to entice me to donate to a cause. … Continue reading How Dare You Use My Personal Info
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. That’s me having a conversation with myself. Usually an ongoing commentary on my daily activities. Actually more like an instructional video that sounds like: OK, first you're going to do this. Then you're doing this, followed by this, with the word "this" changing to reflect my list of tasks. There … Continue reading Talking To Myself
Six years ago this month, my short story collection, Prerequisites For Sleep, was published. At the time, I spent my days as a graphic designer who did some copy writing. I was in my mid fifties and had worked long and hard to make the book happen. In reality, it took ten years to complete … Continue reading That Elusive Writing Career
