OR… How To Not Spend Three Plus Hours A Day On Your Blog
WordPress has informed The Lazy Bitch that this week marks her blogiversary. For three years she has been tossing her stuff out into the blogosphere as an exercise in creative writing or as rants to get all the crap that can keep her awake at night off her chest and out of her head. When she goes back to look through her blogs, there is no doubt that the early ones were the best ones. Those early ones that were either buried in unpublished manuscripts or just needed to be written for years.
Over the past three years, The Lazy Bitch has honed her blogging technique from originally taking several days to think of, write, proof and publish a single blog to taking a couple hours or less each week. She never wanted a blog that took over her life. She didn’t want to give that kind of commitment, and she certainly didn’t want to put in that kind of work. She wanted an outlet, something akin to a hobby. She is by far the furthest thing from what WordPress would call a successful blogger; but she is a content blogger and here is how she became one:
Frequency – The Lazy Bitch knows that there are bloggers out there who post daily, sometimes several times a day; and although she admires these bloggers, she has no aspirations to be one of them. She could not come up with that much to say. She could not come up with that much time. She doesn’t want to come up with that much time. She decided in the very beginning to average about one blog a week and has pretty well stuck to that except the few, very few, times that she tossed two out into the world close together to mess up the average. The second one most likely being about something that was keeping her awake and making her even more bitchy. To The Lazy Bitch, blogging has become a way to let things go.
Followers – The Lazy Bitch does not spend any time trolling / networking for followers. She lets them come sauntering in, hopefully with glasses of wine or other libations in hand. She does not want to guilt them into a following position. She wants them to want to be there. Over the last three years she has gathered a nice collection of followers. Not thousands, not one thousand, not even five hundred; but a slow growing collection of people who sometimes want to read her bitchy musings. Not all of them really want to be there. Some are trolls, like the twenty-something financial planners that have Hollywood teeth and never really do anything but hit the follow button because they are looking for business. Then there are the robot followers, the ones who follow several times in a single week because they are computer generated. Any way, it is not the number of followers one has that is important. Marketing campaigns use the statistic of 20% to indicate a success, meaning if 20% of the target market responds to the campaign, then it is a success. The Lazy Bitch feels her blog is a resounding success because at least 23% of her followers actually read it. What more could she want? Especially for the amount of work she puts in.
Follows – The lazy bitch does not follow many blogs. She does not want to be inundated with email every morning. She does not want to feel the pressure of having to read so much every day. Besides she usually has a good book on the go. But know this, if she follows you, it is because she really wants to. Because you entertain or interest her in a way that is inspiring. She has taken the time to check you out to see if you are a comfortable fit for her lazy approach. She may have visited your blog a few times before making the follow commitment; but once committed, she is loyal. The blogs she follows are wonderful and form an eclectic mix that adds to her contented-blogger status.
Commenting. The Lazy Bitch may not comment on everything. Sometimes the introvert in her doesn’t always feel like making conversation. Sometimes she just can’t think of anything witty or relevant to say. She is a person who doesn’t necessary think quickly when it comes to responses or arguments, or debates or small talk. That’s just the way it goes. If nothing comes to mind, she will say nothing. But she will usually hit the like button to let you know she’s dropped by.
Games and Challenges – The Lazy Bitch is not interested in any of these things and doesn’t play well with others. Ask those bloggers who have initiated such things and thrown down the gauntlet in the past. Mostly she feels it is too much work. After all when it comes to blogging this bitch is lazy.
Once upon a time the Lazy Bitch had aspirations of being a writer. She studied at Humber. Pages and pages of work take up space on her computer. Several short stories were published in literary journals. A short story collection was finally published in 2014 and she thought she was on her way. So she kept at it. Two more manuscripts, a novel and a memoir, were repeatedly sent out and repeatedly rejected over the years. Children’s books were also sent out and rejected many times. The work involved in writing, editing and sending manuscripts out can be exhausting. The thought of doing it these days is overwhelming so The Bitch just prefers to be lazy. And after three years at this blogging thing, The Lazy Bitch is still surprised and pleased when someone decides to read or follow her work.
Thank you for reading.
Photo: S L Unsplash