The Lazy Bitch’s Guide To Blogging

OR… How To Not Spend Three Plus Hours A Day On Your Blog

WordPress has informed The Lazy Bitch that this week marks her blogiversary. For three years she has been tossing her stuff out into the blogosphere as an exercise in creative writing or as rants to get all the crap that can keep her awake at night off her chest and out of her head. When she goes back to look through her blogs, there is no doubt that the early ones were the best ones. Those early ones that were either buried in unpublished manuscripts or just needed to be written for years. 

Over the past three years, The Lazy Bitch has honed her blogging technique from originally taking several days to think of, write, proof and publish a single blog to taking a couple hours or less each week. She never wanted a blog that took over her life. She didn’t want to give that kind of commitment, and she certainly didn’t want to put in that kind of work. She wanted an outlet, something akin to a hobby. She is by far the furthest thing from what WordPress would call a successful blogger; but she is a content blogger and here is how she became one:

Frequency – The Lazy Bitch knows that there are bloggers out there who post daily, sometimes several times a day; and although she admires these bloggers, she has no aspirations to be one of them. She could not come up with that much to say. She could not come up with that much time. She doesn’t want to come up with that much time. She decided in the very beginning to average about one blog a week and has pretty well stuck to that except the few, very few, times that she tossed two out into the world close together to mess up the average. The second one most likely being about something that was keeping her awake and making her even more bitchy. To The Lazy Bitch, blogging has become a way to let things go. 

Followers – The Lazy Bitch does not spend any time trolling / networking for followers. She lets them come sauntering in, hopefully with glasses of wine or other libations in hand. She does not want to guilt them into a following position. She wants them to want to be there. Over the last three years she has gathered a nice collection of followers. Not thousands, not one thousand, not even five hundred; but a slow growing collection of people who sometimes want to read her bitchy musings. Not all of them really want to be there. Some are trolls, like the twenty-something financial planners that have Hollywood teeth and never really do anything but hit the follow button because they are looking for business. Then there are the robot followers, the ones who follow several times in a single week because they are computer generated. Any way, it is not the number of followers one has that is important. Marketing campaigns use the statistic of 20% to indicate a success, meaning if 20% of the target market responds to the campaign, then it is a success. The Lazy Bitch feels her blog is a resounding success because at least 23% of her followers actually read it. What more could she want? Especially for the amount of work she puts in.

Follows – The lazy bitch does not follow many blogs. She does not want to be inundated with email every morning. She does not want to feel the pressure of having to read so much every day. Besides she usually has a good book on the go. But know this, if she follows you, it is because she really wants to. Because you entertain or interest her in a way that is inspiring. She has taken the time to check you out to see if you are a comfortable fit for her lazy approach. She may have visited your blog a few times before making the follow commitment; but once committed, she is loyal. The blogs she follows are wonderful and form an eclectic mix that adds to her contented-blogger status.

Commenting. The Lazy Bitch may not comment on everything. Sometimes the introvert in her doesn’t always feel like making conversation. Sometimes she just can’t think of anything witty or relevant to say. She is a person who doesn’t necessary think quickly when it comes to responses or arguments, or debates or small talk. That’s just the way it goes. If nothing comes to mind, she will say nothing. But she will usually hit the like button to let you know she’s dropped by.

Games and Challenges – The Lazy Bitch is not interested in any of these things and doesn’t play well with others. Ask those bloggers who have initiated such things and thrown down the gauntlet in the past. Mostly she feels it is too much work. After all when it comes to blogging this bitch is lazy.

Once upon a time the Lazy Bitch had aspirations of being a writer. She studied at Humber. Pages and pages of work take up space on her computer. Several short stories were published in literary journals. A short story collection was finally published in 2014 and she thought she was on her way. So she kept at it. Two more manuscripts, a novel and a memoir, were repeatedly sent out and repeatedly rejected over the years. Children’s books were also sent out and rejected many times. The work involved in writing, editing and sending manuscripts out can be exhausting. The thought of doing it these days is overwhelming so The Bitch just prefers to be lazy. And after three years at this blogging thing, The Lazy Bitch is still surprised and pleased when someone decides to read or follow her work.

Thank you for reading. 

Photo: S L Unsplash

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44 thoughts on “The Lazy Bitch’s Guide To Blogging

  1. Congrats on three years! I must admit, I did stumble onto your page, but not with a wine glass in hand. A coffee mug, more like it. I myself have just gone through a phase of wanting to reclaim the hours I spend on WordPress. Regardless, I’m wishing you all the best on your publishing journey, lazy or not!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Wow I could hug you for this, I love it! I realize it wasn’t meant to be humorous, but I’d like to think that through all our communication I have a fairly good idea of your personality and truly adore you and what you bring to this site. Thanks!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you. I do enjoy our interactions. There is a sincerity between us because we get each other. I always try to inject some humour and sarcasm into my blogs so laugh away if you feel inspired to do so.

      Like

  3. It gets overwhelming sometimes and sometimes it’s much easier to come up with some drivel to write on a blog then to think up the hard words for work purposes. 😐

    Keep writing the way you do! I enjoy it which is why I come by, even without wine or coffee… 😀🤷‍♀️

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Love this. I post when I can not daily [heaven forbid]. I don’t do any challenges or use any prompts because like you said, I don’t play well with other. I follow who I want based on a similar criterion as yours, they have to be quirky in some way. Eclectic is good. Happy Anniversary! Would that more bloggers follow your lead.

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Thanks. I like to make things easy. I have tried following you several times but for some reason that follow button just doesn’t want to work for me. I will try again though. Quirky and eclectic is definitely good in my books.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Oh, how I love this post! If you have written it about me you really would have to change much. Maybe the sending out the manuscripts part. We started around the same time and have a very similar approach to blogging. I am so glad that my blog is a comfortable fit for your lazy approach, congratulations on three years of allowing us to laugh, rant, and bitch with you!

    Liked by 2 people

  6. True confession: I want to be you. Or at least your philosophy, WordPress-wise.

    I used to be the uber-dedicated blogger, constantly networking and posting nearly every day, for years. (This is why my archives are so extensive, with nearly 15 years and multiple different blogs contributing to the buildup.) And I enjoyed it, for a very long time.

    But now I don’t. I think it’s obvious (perhaps only to me) that my main blog is no longer the inspiration it once was. It’s often three or four days between posts, and for the last few months said posts have mostly consisted of revamps from the archives, with little “new” material. My responses to comments on my own blog have become shorter, and I’ve practically stopped commenting on other blogs except for a very select few. Clearly, the thrill is somewhat gone.

    Yet it’s hard to break the habit of “how it used to be”. I feel guilty with the gaps between posts and my growing apathy toward commenting and proper interactions with other blogs I realize that’s all on me, no one is forcing me to do this, but the adjustment has been a struggle. I just need to work a little harder on my mindset and learn to let things go.

    Thanks for the push…

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hey you know we all love your blogs whether new or repeats but we are also realistic and understand exhaustion, boredom and the need to make changes. If you need to stop or take a break you have to realize that the only person who would be disappointed in you is you. Do what you have to do and don’t feel guilty about it. It took a long while for me to figure that out but I am much better since I did.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I am right there with you, Jennifer! As a wise woman (probably a woman) once said: “Ain’t nobody got time for that.” Kudos on your three years of entertaining readers with your real, raw, and funny posts. And, you write the best titles! 💜

    Liked by 2 people

  8. You know you can self-publish books now don’t you?

    I follow quite a few blogs but have set it that I don’t get e-mails when they post – I just look in my reader when I log onto my blog. I’m the same in that, if I haven’t got a comment for a post, I generally leave a like so that the blogger knows I’ve read it. I try to comment where I can though as I personally like comments on my blog – I never bother how many likes but I do like the comments.

    I started out trying to (and generally managing) to post once a week but that was when I was doing all the Munros in Scotland and had lots of people wanting to read about them and see how far I’d got. Now I’ve finished my hill lists for now, I was aiming to post around monthly. However, since taking on all my mother’s stuff and with all the job hunting etc. I haven’t even had time for that so it’s just as and when now.

    I quite like the challenges as they’re generally on a subject I have lots to add to and find interesting – at least the ones I’ve been sent are. If it isn’t anything which interests me I just ignore them.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes I do know I can self publish, but I also know how much marketing and promoting is required to successfully sell enough copies of a book to make it worth while, which in my case would be covering the cost of a professional editor and having more than a few family and friends purchase it. It is a whole lot of work and I am getting lazier as I get older.

      I find I actually enjoy seeing posts from less frequent bloggers. It is like meeting up with an old friend that you haven’t seen in a while. So when you do get time to publish posts, you know I will be reading.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. You’re right about the marketing and promoting. You could put a shout out on your blog but, selling bookswise, that still isn’t many books selling to cover your costs. I’ve still considered writing one myself though…

        Liked by 2 people

  9. You sound a lot like me. I blog once every 10 days or so, but I don’t like deadlines. This is supposed to be fun. Sometimes I take it more seriously than others, but lately, I feel myself getting lazy. I took a two-week break from blogging (actually no more than 15 minutes per day) and got into that groove. It’s been two weeks since I’ve caught up, and it’s really okay. As I’ve always told my wife, it it ever stops being fun, I’ll find something else to do. (Fun is one of my priorities in retirement.)

    Liked by 2 people

  10. I’m not sure when I stumbled upon you and even though I may not comment, I read every post you publish. I enjoy your writing style and your laziness. A lot like me. I post about once a week. I will only spend about 45 minutes on writing a post, no more than that. Anymore and it feels like work.

    Liked by 2 people

  11. Thanks for inadvertently revealing that I too am a lazy bitch. Your blogging habits are my blogging habits, pretty much — except I think I’m more erratic. So it’s still fun. I hope I never apologize for failing to blog … Why would anyone care? I do love the little community that drops in and out of my blogging world, and smile when I see their comments on other blogs (hi Ally Bean! hi Writer of Words!) When I am silent it’s usually because “real life” Is especially interesting or demanding. I’m sure you’ll carry on telling truths and fictions: you are a writer, of course.

    Liked by 1 person

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