The bitch had been known to lose it at times. People thought she was crazy. Absolutely nuts and out of control. People who didn’t understand her struggles with over-the-top hormone imbalances, low self esteem and an inability to manage stress. They did not know that her biggest battle was often with herself.
This was before she gained the upper hand over the many, many things that set her off. It wasn’t easy but she did it, and here are some of the ways she managed to do it.
People – People annoy this bitch. There are some people who bring out the worst in her. People who constantly piss her off and keep her awake at night. Fickle people. Whiny people. Woe-is-me people. Narcissistic-self-absorbed people. Self-righteous people. People who need to be martyrs. People who take credit for the work of others or throw them under the bus. Chauvinists… You get the picture. We are talking about 85 percent of the population, give or take. The bitch decided to distance herself from all the people who made her crazy. Yes even family members. In her case, definitely family members. She may need to see them on rare occasions; but believe me, she makes them very rare. Now she will admit that this decision did not make her very popular, but it certainly has improved her mental health.
Hobbies – things to help quiet the mind. The bitch was never one to sit around feeling sorry for herself. Actually, she prefers not to sit most of the time; but occasionally she would fall into a well. Everything looks darker in a well. Everyone feels crazier in a well. The best way for the bitch to stay out of the well is to do things she liked to do. Over the years she has filled her time with some very enjoyable things. Hobbies and activities that keep her busy, healthy and happy. Kayaking, gardening and watching baseball in the summer. Jigsaw puzzles and piano in the winter, Walking, yoga, blogging, reading and spending time with the people who don’t piss her off all year round. Believe me these have made a huge difference in the sanity of the once crazy bitch.
Getting Physical – The bitch started by taking up walking. Actually it was stomping. Nothing felt better than a good stomp around her house or her neighbourhood. These days there is very little stomping, just walking and the many other physical activities listed above. All this activity does so much for her mental and physical health. She feels she is living proof of how much it can do in a few short years.
Nature – The bitch loves being out in nature. It is calming and puts everything else into perspective. She highly recommends a good dose of nature for one’s sanity. Combined with physical activity, it is a double dose.
Rants – The bitch needs to get things out. Sometimes it is in a very vocal rant, full of loud and colourful language, taking place when she is home alone because ranting around others or in public is no longer acceptable no matter how good it feels. Some rants are banged out on her keyboard and may become a blog topic, others are just filed away. Getting things out is important for the bitch’s sanity. She highly recommends it. It doesn’t matter whether the ranting process is vocal, banged on keys or pushed out with a pen or pencil. Just get it out.
Drama – Really, the bitch doesn’t need to get sucked into the drama of others. It drives her crazy. It keeps her awake at night. The times she did get sucked into the drama, she came out on bottom because dramatic people are fickle and you can’t trust what they say from one day to the next. At all costs, she avoids the drama.
Guilt – Up until a few years ago, the bitch had been governed by guilt for her entire life. She was a magnet for it. She struggled with decisions because of it. But no more. There were straws and then a final straw, and now the bitch no longer gives in to the guilt. It still rears its ugly head; but she just pushes it back down and moves on with her healthier, calmer life. And the more she does this, the easier things become.
Self Like – It took a very long time, but the bitch finally likes the person she has become. She has learned to accept her flaws and has changed some of her personality traits that she didn’t like. She has become a confident and independent thinker and is less likely to sabotage her decisions. And even though she is introverted, she speaks up and stands up for herself and other people or things that are near and dear to her. She overthinks much less and that is a good thing.
So all and all the crazy bitch has not had too many crazy moments in the past few years. It is something she is very happy about. It is all a part of managing the things she can control.
Thank you for reading.
Photo: Daniel K. Cheung, Unsplash